On day 1 of the quarantine mandate, I was a wreck.
It seemed as though the world was ending and it was disappointing to still be single. Uncertain about what tomorrow would be, I was angry with God for allowing me to be single in such a season. I mean I’ve survived countless holidays, weddings and other adult milestones single, but I wasn’t prepared for this.
In an idea world, I’d be living my best life in quarantine with bae. But that was far from reality. I spent the evening of day 1 in a pool of tears questioning my self-worth and upset with God for not fulfilling the promise in time for this pandemic. Like I felt after all of my years dedicated to Him, I deserved a man by my side right now. (Entitled much?)
I guess it takes something life shifting to help you realize what’s important in life. As the days have gone by and the very things like my job and my home that I thought were solid became unstable, I began to notice the areas in my life that I’ve put too much trust in or made an idol out of. Relationships are one of those things that are often put on a pedestal. And though I knew the world wasn’t ending, I was faced with my worst nightmare and that’s being completely alone. I’ve always said “God, I’ll choose you whether you bless me or not”, but have lived a life showing God that if He doesn’t give me what I want, I’ll live for Him but be miserable.
Those first two days, I WAS miserable and I made myself sick because stress is real. Yes, the current state of the world had me SKRESSED, but mainly I was mad for being single through it all. You ever feel like if you had someone to go through the fire with, the heat would be easier to bear? Well, that’s how I felt.
The crazy thing is that with this pandemic and having high risk parents, my priorities began to shift after days of misery. I realized that with everything going on in the world, being in a relationship aren’t foundational necessities like joy despite it all and spiritual wellness. Basically it’s not THAT big of a deal.
Not gonna front though, marriage is probably one of the biggest promises I want to be fulfilled. However, it doesn’t guarantee you a ticket to heaven. Christ does. It’s a beautiful desire to have but it’s not worth taking your peace or pushing you away from Christ — which it’s done both to me before.
So, after getting my mind right, quarantine life has been much more bearable than I thought. Check out some ways I’ve been able to cope with quarantine while being single.
Love on the people you do have
Too often we dream about a love we don’t have that we don’t cherish the love we have.
Connect with your community
After days of mainly talking COVID-19, my conversations shifted gears in hopes to retain normalcy and sanity. I’ve been spending time having virtual meet ups and bible studies. FaceTime has been a saving grace.
Find Joy In The Free Time
Silencing the anxiety and other thoughts has been hard but when I do, it’s been beautiful! I’ve spent days getting reacquainted with myself in the ways my busy life hasn’t allowed. AND if I might add, I’m dope AF.
Y’all I’ve gotten so much sleep, I’m exhausted from being over rested. Is that a thing?